behind.
when i started this blog in january, i had a dream of posting an average of 4 blogs every month.  as you can see, i'm about 8 blogs behind and the year is nearly over.  i'm going to try to play catch-up.  we'll see if i make it.  i'll try not to cheat and split single blogs into several posts.  i'll try.
restless.
i think it has something to do with the fact that my 1-year anniversary at this job is today.  thanks for remembering, by the way.
this was my goal - to have a grown-up job for one year.  now i've done it.  i'm officially respectable.
the problem with reaching my goal is that now i am no longer satisfied at this desk.  admittedly, my satisfaction over the past year was a precarious thing, but now it is ever more fragile.  broken, even.  i was at this point once before - in the early spring, i believe.  then, it was because i had nothing to do here.  then, my antidote was to plan a move to central america.  i know it would likely not happened, but the thought freed my mind.  freedom of the mind, i believe, is far more important than freedom of any other kind.
this time, i'm not planning a move to central america.  i'm applying to grad school.  i take the GRE next wednesday.  i'm applying to duke divinity for the masters of theological studies program; unc chapel hill for the masters of english program; and hopefully an english program or two back in england.  in fact, if anyone knows anything about any english programs in england, that would be helpful.  i have no idea where to begin picking one, or even three.
i'm taking the GRE and applying to these programs not necessarily because it's what i believe i need to do next, but because these acts give me a sort of vital forward momentum.  if i fail and don't get into anything, or decide i just don't have enough money, then at least i tried.  in that case, i would most likely embark on a job-search.  after all, i am respectable now.
i would love to work in a PR/editorial position at a non-profit organization or interesting publication.  those sorts of jobs aren't exactly flooding craigslist, but who knows.
 
